In light of the recent attempt of the “Panty Bomber” to explode a bomb concealed in his crotch, Air2Air has reviewed its security procedures and found them significantly superior to those that allowed the Panty Bomber to get on board a Delta A-330 (Actually NorthWest Airlines flight 253) and fly into the US where the Terrorist intended to inject an accelerant into his concealed adult diaper bomb. (Please see illustration.)
As a former NorthWest Airline’s pilot who flew into and out of Amsterdam’s Schiphol Airport, I have to admit I am surprised that the 23 year old Terrorist, Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, was able to make it past individual passenger screening. Especially since the US State Department had requested that his Visa be revoked. (What, our State Department cannot revoke a Visa? You have got to be feeding me those Japanese delicacies, Shiitake Mushrooms!) I’ve been through that screening many times as an aircrew, and when traveling with my family, and I would like to see the video tape and hear the questions he was asked and the answers he gave. Those steely eyed Dutch are not easy to fool.
Unfortunately, I think that Janet Napolitano’s first statement that “The system worked.” is exactly correct. The system worked as well as it is ever going to work and the publicized security system is humorous at best. Thankfully, the training the Terrorist Abdulmutallab received must not have been very effective. I mean, how hard can it be to set off a diaper bomb?
The reaction by the TSA, the department of Homeland Security, and the airlines has been predictable. No need to keep people who have a “right” to travel off the airplanes. No, they will just make all of the passengers sit with their hands in full view in their laps the last hour of the flight. (After all, anyone who is anyone in government flys on government air anyway. No such requirement there, and the common traveler, the unwashed masses, should not complain. Obviously these precautions will make them safer.)
In light of the recent threat developments, Air2Air has reviewed its security procedures and revised them or reaffirmed their effectiveness and validity.
1.) If the father of one of our customers calls and warns us against their son or daughter, we will not allow that customer to board.
2.) If the customer’s credit card does not clear before the flight, the customer will not be boarded.
3.) The Pilots of our flights will personally eyeball every customer and apply Air2Air's “Terrorist Identification System” to determine if any of our passengers represent a risk to the crew, the aircraft, or their fellow passengers. (Also not much of an imposition. Our pilots always meet our customers prior to boarding.)
4.) All passengers on Air2Air flights must approve of every other passenger on the flight prior to departure. (This is not much of an inconvenience. Virtually all of our flights are booked by a single party and everyone on the flight knows everyone else. Not only that, with a maximum of five passengers, how many people are there to know?)
5.) No person who has attended any terrorist training camp, terrorist school, or taken terrorist correspondence courses is ever allowed on our flights.
6.) Although no Air2Air passenger is ever required to remove their shoes for inspection, if while airborne, the customer wants to remove their shoes they are more than welcome to do so. (However, shoes which are “ticking” or which appear to have a fuze protruding from the heel will not be allowed on board. Children’s skate mechanism shoes are always accommodated.)
7.) We have eliminated bathroom breaks on our Turbo Charged Twin Engined Piper Senecas. (There was never a bathroom on board.)
8.) On our Turbo Charged Twin Engined Piper Senecas, passengers may only move from their present seat to one of the five designated seats. (Gee, there are only five seats available besides the pilots and the passengers are strictly forbidden to occupy the pilots seat during flight. Passengers may occupy the pilots seat on the ground before or after the flight for the purpose of taking photographs.)
9.) Only electronic equipment brought on board by passengers themselves can be used during flight.
10.) Passengers must identify all baggage they bring on board the flight as being theirs and must affirm that they, or their Mom, packed their bag.
11.) Other Air2Air secret procedures designed to enhance passenger safety.
We hope that our review of our anti-terrorist procedures for our San Diego air charter customers will provide them with the confidence that flying on Air2Air's air charter flights is the safest way to avoid the threat of terrorism.
